Different… Not better.

Last night ThomasWade offered to clean the kitchen after dinner. ThomasWade is the one that we have to remind to put his plate by the sink and throw his trash away after almost every meal. So I was pretty shocked when he offered. Now I know that really the only reason he offered was because he wanted a few stars on his chart. When the chart is full, then he gets a SnoCone. So, he is really wanting to fill it up fast. Anyway, yesterday was a very LONG day of no electronics and honestly my nerves were shot. So I welcomed the idea of not cleaning the kitchen.

But here is the problem…. I am not OCD by any means, but I do have a small problem letting ThomasWade do tasks without trying to micro-manage the situation. This has always been an issue. I don’t do this with the little ones, just with him. I am not sure if it’s because he is the first-born or what, but I struggle with just letting him do things. So last night I was exhausted and decided to let him do it his own way. I stayed distracted talking to Trent and entertaining the little ones. After a little while he came over and announced that he was done. Any other time I would have gone over and talked him through “better” ways of doing things. But not last night. I gave him a huge hug and a big kiss. I looked him in the eyes, told him how thankful I was and proud to have such a helpful son. Then we marched to the star chart and gladly gave him 3 stars. Although he thought that would have earned him FIVE stars, he was still so happy.

Moore to the Story: This morning I opened the dishwasher to find that it was all wrong. The bowls were on the bottom… plates laid at the top. So, I started to grab the bowl to re-organize it, but then I stopped myself. Just because I would have loaded it different doesn’t mean that it was better. It would still get clean. I got a flash of ThomasWade’s big smile that night and decided to LET IT GO. Yep, smooth started singing Elsa at 8:45 in the morning while I put in the detergent. You should try it! It’s very liberating and the little ones got a good laugh. I hope that I can continue to let little things go, it’s a great feeling.


2 thoughts on “Different… Not better.

  1. Carla, I really liked this. I know this made Thomas Wades night. You are an awesome mama to your kids! I agree that it is very hard to just let them do without micromanaging them! I am proud of you.

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